I've been busting my ass for the last 2 weeks no booze. Handling business and while I might not have gotten everything I wanted done. I know I handled biz.
It's Friday and that means it's time to get back on that dynastoned daily debauchery son. We goin hard in the percocet and pacifico game. I like to call it gettin' some P&P similar to R&R just a lot more enjoyable. :D
thats right lil nigga i decided to start drinking some magnificently formulated imported spic beer in the form of a tecate at 3am. i must say it was probably one of the best decisions ive made in recent years.
i also posted a sneak peak of the new design. it doesn't look that impressive on here but it will be far more functional and magical i promise.
its been like 20 something days i think now of alcohol consumption and pill popping greatness. it finally commenced into a bastard of a hangover and a bit of vomit monday morning about 30 minutes before i had to be at work.
i of course fought off the hellish hangover with a few grunts and a steady dose of opiates in the form of a synthetic pill(s). It had been a disastrous weekend and was now spilling into the work week where I'm supposed to be somewhat coherent.
Needless to say when I got home from work monday I took it easy and ate a few more goodies that i like to call vikings aka more opiates. In general I was just trying to get some sleep. Hoping Tuesday would bring a brighter future if only for a few hours at a time. "Hope" as turns out is a very dangerous thought process.
So the following morning I finally drag my half dead ass out of bed after hitting the snooze button 12 times. Hop in the shower give myself a quick rinse, surprisingly actually put some gel in my hair, grab my shit, and hop in the truck.
Already running 10 minutes late I do what any reasonable person would do... Drive like a fucking maniac all the way to work. Breaking every traffic law in the book. Crossing double yellows, passing 3 semi's at a time, doing 100mph into oncoming traffic. All the while singing along to some jimi hendrix playing on the stereo. You know, the norm.
Finally show up to work completely sober for the first time in weeks, 5 minutes late as usual. Typical for a guy trying to get fired, but thats a story for another day.
It turns out to be a pretty uneventful stress filled day with mountains of paper work that I have to dig myself out of daily. Eventually 4:30 rolls around. So I drag my leather ass home via 90 mph in the silverado while I nod off from complete mental exhaustion. All in a days work.
Only to come home to news of my dads cancer surgery. You guessed it, unsuccessful. He has already left amid the bad news to the mountains to try and clear his head with some 357 gun fire. So I'm left alone stewing on all of this. Pretty helpless at the moment with nothing but a truck and a pocket full of money.
After a few decisive beers flow down my esophagus I'm feeling randy. So I hop in the truck, drunk driving in my glass house, and let the tires spin all the way down the road on the way to the liquor store. Blowing through stop signs with zero regard for pedestrians. Last of my worries is a simple DUI Manslaughter at this point.
Once I reach the terrorist liquor store I immediately grab 3 sticks of teriyaki beef jerky and an ice cold box of Pacifico. Two of the handful of things in life I genuinely enjoy. Roll myself home and turn up the tunes. Because of course when all else fails get yourself some beer, music, and beef jerky.
So after an entertaining night of alcohol consumption and loud music I jump in the sack and dream about the lighter things in life.
And the cycle starts all over again. Green vile flying from the same throat I so graciously sent all those beers down with. Spreading across the bathroom floor and toilet seat at high velocity. Only to wipe it up, brush it off, and smile at myself in the mirror muttering under my breath how sick of a human being I really am.
The daily life of the dynastoned. Isn't as gracious as it may appear, but I'm still here!
Thats right suck it you fucking cunt. All I do is drink beer and bitch about work. I need to smoke weed everyday but I don't always get around to it. Either way you can suck it nigger.
On a lighter note nignogs make me sick. Chinese people with their ching chang chong talk need to go back to their country we don't understand them. Also wide nosed breathin' all the white mans air niggers should rot in hell.
Thats right you fucking nignog stickam kids this is that treal imported spic beer post. You kids can't see me I'm the original imported spic beer drinker. Nobody drink coronas, tecate, and pacifico quite like the dynastoned alcoholic imported spic drinker.
:D thats right suck my sack you fucking faggot wannabes. I drink that shit like water I'm that real big fish in a small pond. Fuck guppie ass niggas suck my sack.
Somehow I found myself flying down I-5 in my 1992 Chevrolet Silverado breaking every traffic law in the book while I passed through Truckee, CA. I was on my journey to "the biggest little city in the world". Reno, Nevada.
It all started after a series of blunders and multiple evasive maneuvers to escape the clutches of a spouses family type gathering.
So I head out of town without calling anyone or having anything planned. Show up to 15 excuses and or non responses to my request for fun at any local hole in the wall bar for the evening (AKA bunch of lame asses with no $$).
Sitting in my truck staring at my cell phones contact list contemplating which persons house I'm going to raid on this cold Friday night. I come to the conclusion it's not looking good. It's going to end up anticlimactic and boring if I do anything in this town tonight.
So what do I do?
LOL!
From there I went on to get smammered every way imaginable. It was a most glorious weekend filled with cold nights sleeping in ski resort parking lots shivering until I awake to turn the car on for more hot air flowing from the vents at high velocity. To playing with cocktail waitresses cleavage in the middle of the casino and drinking 3 hennessy & cokes at a time for hours on end while losing all my money on the horse races. IE: figure 2.1 section 3 below.
Figure 2.1 Section 3:
The weekend only got better. As I was assigned the only room left in the sold out hotel in the luxurious Silvery Legacy Casino and Resort in Reno, Nevada. Which just so happened to be a top floor HANDICAPPED suite. You heard me correctly. A mother fucking handicap persons suite. Fully equipped with hand rails, huge door ways, great views, and a spacious bathroom.
And what kind of trip would it be without an arsenal of fully automatic weaponry?
Just check out those sweet AK's and AR15's waiting to be purchased by California residents at discount prices via the pawn shop right across the street from 12 different casinos. Go figure right? LOLOL! fucking degenerate gamblers must be more common than I had originally thought.
Who the fuck am I kidding? I left this fucking town with my pockets inside out too. hahahaaaa
The moral of this story is.... When all else fails drink massive amounts of imported spic beer and cognac, lose all your money via a casino sports book, play with titties, and last but not least enjoy yourself mayne.
mmm yeah renee perez can suck deez nuts all day. I got two hairy nuts that are just waiting for that mouth.
that is all for today. ily all and please do me a favor, donate lots of money to porn and imported spic beer. I promise you it will never steer you wrong. In fact it does a body good. nbd js
